Ahh, at last. After 3 weeks I have finally stopped
accidently writing ’12 when marking the date next to a signature or check. And
now that the excitement of a new year is starting to die down, I wanted to fill
everyone in some more changes to our lives. A few years ago, I would have never
imagined that I would be trying to start a family. It took a long time for me
to feel comfortable with the idea, but now I am beyond excited. However, I know
that the road to becoming a father will not be easy as I watch my wife suffer
through all of the procedures and side effects of doing IVF.
I am so proud of her courage to face the challenge of
becoming a mother in the most difficult way possible. Sometimes I feel so
helpless as I see her go through all of the injections, exams, and procedures.
I have tried to support her in every way possible, and that includes giving her
the peace of mind that we are stable at home and with work.
Over the past four and a half years, I have made a career of
trying to bring some of the coolest electronics to the market at Apple. During
that time I have met some amazing people, engineers, and friends. However, the
rigors of working at Apple are demanding. Late night conference calls,
spontaneous long-term travel, and stressful workday hours really took their
toll. Things were different when I was single. But now that I have made the
best decision of life in marrying Staci, I have had to come to the reality that
it was time to make another one.
As much as I loved my work at Apple, it was becoming
unsustainable. This past summer, I was travelling more than home, and when I
was domestic, I was working more than not. I am blessed to have had an
incredibly patient wife who was supportive of my career. We were doing great. I
was showing steady progression within the company, and being able to provide a
great life for Staci and Hunter. To any outsider, we were living the American
dream.
But the whole time, I was beginning to break down inside. I
couldn’t stand to spend so much time away from her and the dog, but even more
so, I couldn’t stand to be thinking about all the things at work that were not
getting done while I was with them. Work was consuming me. In order to preserve
the quality of life I had worked so hard to build for us, I made a promise to
myself that I would never let Staci see the turmoil I was going through inside.
I knew she would feel awful if she knew I was putting myself through so much
and hiding it from her. Huge mistake.
And so came along a simple text message from an old Apple
friend who had moved on to a company called Nest. He just asked if I was
interested in coming to lunch with him. There was no mention of a job, or any
interest, but just lunch with an old friend. So of course I accepted the
invitation. During our lunch, we caught up on our lives, and he was able to
read how something at Apple was really wearing on me. Soon after our lunch was
over, he suggested that I come up to Nest to meet with some of the engineers
just so they could tell me what the company was all about.
I accepted the invitation and a few days later found myself
sitting on a couch at Nest shooting the breeze with a bunch of old Apple
engineers. What started as a casual conversation led to an interview about a
week later. I was going to Nest again and again meeting with multiple people.
Things were going great. And the more and more I was thinking about it, the
more and more I wanted to work there. They expressed morals that would allow me
to focus on family first while still working in a field that was cutting edge
and exciting.
The more excited I was getting about the job, the more
apprehensive I was getting about telling Staci. Not only would I have to admit
how unhappy I was at Apple, but it was right during our first round of IVF.
Talk about timing… And then Nest made me an offer. I knew it was time to talk
to Staci. At first she was upset because of the afore mentioned reasons, but
also because of all the added stress of changing jobs while trying to start a
family.
Understanding, Staci’s concerns, Nest invited her up to
their headquarters in Palo Alto to talk about the job and for her to ask any
questions that she may have. I was blown away by this offer, and I do not think
Staci first understood the significance. This is not something that any company
would do. So we went to Palo Alto and we met with one of the founders of the
company, and several other VPs. She was able to ask very candid questions and
express her concerns directly to some of the most influential people there. And
lets just say she was happy with what they had to say.
And so after running some complex financial calculations to
understand what would happen if I were to change jobs, we agreed on a plan, and
it included me changing careers to Nest. I was so excited. Now, we can’t
exactly continue to live the “rock and roll” lifestyle, but we will still live
comfortably and most importantly, continue our efforts to start a family
through IVF.
Now two days into the job, I am positive I made the right
choice. I am more relaxed at home, and enjoying the work that I will be doing
for Nest. Now that we are done with the transition of me moving jobs, it is now
time to start focusing on the next milestone of our lives: starting a family.
Side note: at the same time we decided for Matthew to change jobs, we decided I needed to give notice to my job. Due to IVF I'm just not able to work at this time- travel, meds, side effects, appointments- it's just too much to be the consistent caregiver I need to be. I'm so pleased that my good friend Heather is going to be taking over and the family I love will be in good hands with her! For a girl who doesn't do well with change, this was a whole lot to deal with all within a matter of days, but we're so excited as they take place!
Loved reading Matt's thoughts! So excited to see what happens :)
ReplyDeleteI had written a post and asked him to read it over first, and he totally surprised me by telling me he wanted to write one! It was so much fun getting to read it from his perspective! Glad you enjoyed it too :)
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